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| Misanthropic Boomer |
TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE IMPEACHMENT
(With apologies to Clement Moore)
‘Twas the night before impeachment and all through the House
The GOP were trying their best to defend that damn louse.
The charges were posted for the Senate to bear
In hopes that the trial would be speedy and fair.
House members were settled all snug in their places
Both sides with visions of victory, had smiles on their faces.
Republicans selected John Turly selling his own contradictory pap
And as he droned on we all settled in for our very first hearing nap.
When on the White House Lawn there arose such a clatter
Trump said, “There was no quid pro quo, besides if there was, it still doesn’t matter.
“I was only trying to root out corruption in the Ukraine
Committed by Joe and Hunter Biden, again and again.
“You know they’re bad people for the things that they do
Besides, Joe’s in the way. I’ll bet you’d do it too.”
The Dems were all yawning wishing they were home in their beds
While visions of a conviction danced in their heads.
My wife watched on TV while I sat at my MAC
Waiting for the GOP to mount the next deflection attack:,
Deflecting Trump’s crimes their only real course
A tactic learned from the President their final resource.
The lights from TV cameras within the hearing room
Gave a lustre to Republican faces, hiding their gloom.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
But three Democrat’s lawyers; that Nadler brought here
With one Constitutional lawyer, the Dems only woman
I knew in a moment it must be Pam Karlan
The Republican Reps continued the Deflection game
Ranking member Doug Collins calling each by name:
There was Steube, and Armstrong, Biggs, Lesko and Cline;
Reschenthsler and Johnson, Gohmert all fine
Gaetz, Roby, Rattcliff, Sensenbrenner and Buck,
McClintock, Collins, Chabot, and Jordan all trying their luck.
From the front of the Dais to the back of the hall
They lied and deflected for Trump, one and all.
As discarded garbage tends to attract flies
Republicans kept telling more, and bigger lies.
So up to the Senate the Impeachment was sent
The People all hoping Mitch would relent.
But then in a twinkling McConnell called out to Trump
Don’t worry my Prez, the Impeachment I’ll dump.
As I hung my sad head, turning away,
We all knew there would be no conviction today.
As Mitch took his oath to be impartial and fair
The smell of a fix was stinking the air
Mitch was dressed all in brown from his head to his foot
He had on his very best no conviction suit
His very best briefcase he carried in hand
Smug in the knowledge that Trump would not take the stand
His eyes how they twinkled! He was so proud of himself
Happy to be in the bag, the jolly, nasty old elf.
He went straight to the business of letting Trump go
He told all his members just to say no
“The fix is in,” Moscow Mitch said with a grin
Knowing the Impeachment trial the Dems couldn’t win
He sprung from the dais like the down on a thistle
Turned to his GOP team and gave a whistle
“Our work here is done; our votes we have plenty.”
Yet he knew in heart they were dead in twenty-twenty.
igor
